Friday, October 26, 2007 Y
Last day of sch today.Next year go back sch already sec 2.So fast lor.7 years.Known Ainnah,Fiqal and Zul for 7 years.Damn fast lors.Wonder wat will happen 10 years later.Separated from Fiqal,Ainnah and Zul. Gracie told me 2 forget bout Fiqal.I wan 2,but ii jus cant.Who would choose 2 live in misery given a choice??Fell asleep again in class today.Probably so ii could escape from evryting.Didnt wan 2 join Gracie they all.Jus didnt feel like talking.Bad mood.ii dont even noe y ii got angry.Fiqal fiqal fiqal,ii wish ii hadnt met euu at all.
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Syafiq at East Coast last last year.
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Ainnah(de circled 1),and her three cousins.P.S: 2 rashid,ainnah's chio ok!
Thursday, October 25, 2007 Y
Its like got to Ainnah's house too late today.She already moved...I really dunno who to turn to in de future.All tis while,ainnah was de one who comforted me.Went to her house each time ii felt depressed.Now shes gone.Fiqal and Zul arent there for me animore.Who else understands me more than de four of them???My parents are at war wit Fiqal's family.My sister is too young 2 understand.Who else can ii turn to???Why can't my parents jus live in harmony wit Fiqal's family???Why must all tis happen 2 me at de same time????Why cant tings jus return 2 de past.ii really dont wan 2 fake happiness each time i'm wit my family animore.ii dont wan 2 pretend 2 be happy when i'm not animore.ii dont wan 2 go on like tis.Who can ii turn to???
Wednesday, October 24, 2007 Y
Its like unbelievable.Rashid likes sumone.At least its a malay.LT and gracie both also each fell for a chinese guys.Why am ii de only one who fell 4 a malay???Maybe cos ii grew up wit malays.Seems like all my childhood friends are malays.Ainnah,fiqal,nabilah,puteri,zul,daniel,eva...And Ainnah's moving house soon.She told me jus now when ii went her house.Why is evryone leaving me????First Fiqal,now Ainnah.All de people ii grew up wit are leaving me.Why?????7 years...me,fiqal,ainnah and zul have known each other for 7 years.We used 2 play together when we were young.Now 7 years have passed...We have all grown up.Changed.I miss all de times we used 2 play together.Now,de 4 of us are all separated.
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Its like today was in a bad mood de whole day at sch.Dont even noe y.Jus felt like keeping quiet.Sumtimes ii really get so upset.Mood swings.Get angry 4 no reason.Keeping 2 myself.Who have ii becum?ii was never like tis in de past.Cos of Fiqal.Y???ii really miss him so much.Too much.Til ii forget who ii am sometimes.Fiqal ii really liked u so much.A pity my love for u can never last.
Tuesday, October 23, 2007 Y
Went mac eat lunch wit LT and Rashid jus now.Its like me and LT were waving to Cheryl Koh opposite de street and there was tis 2 malay guys in front tot we waving 2 them.And its like one of them waved 2 us and he was like so pai say.LOL.Tinking bout him again...I really miss him,but does he miss me too???Why did ii fall 4 him???Of all people y him????If ii had never fell for him,ii won't be so miserable now.ii can give up evrything right now jus 2 return 2 de past.ii can retake my PSLE again,ii don't even mind taking all my piano lessons again.ii don't even mind getting a lower aggregate score 4 psle.ii jus wan 2 go bac 2 the past.I really really miss him so much.His laughter.We used 2 laugh together alot.But no longer.ii wonder wat will happen 20 years later.Will we still be neighbours?Will he still remember me??ii really really wan 2 hear him call me Marshmallow again...
Monday, October 22, 2007 Y
Its like jus now cum back from sch saw Fiqal again.He jus ignored me.ii shld have seen tis coming.De day ii befriended him,de day ii fell 4 him,ii shld have seen tis coming.ii knew de ending would never be a happy one,ii was prepared,but y does it still hurt so much???Evryone else can 4get evryting so easily.Why can't ii??ii shld have known better than 2 fall for him.Hes a malay.I'm a chinese.Wat can possibly happen??Maybe its was all a mistake.Maybe ii shld have never fell for him.Never.
Sunday, October 21, 2007 Y
Gloomy gloomy gloomy me.Fiqal didnt even wan 2 look at me jus now.I felt terrible.He didnt even glance at me.Tings werent like tat in de past.I really dont noe how 2 face fiqal again.The war has officially started.And ii am de unsuspecting victim.Maybe ii may even die without knowing y.I'm becuming more n more quiet nowadays.I scared ii open my mouth den say de wrong tings,so better jus shut up.I don't even laugh at all.How too when war is going on?I will get angry 4 no reason,ii seldom open my mouth 2 talk,ii dont even laugh at all now.Wat have ii becum????WHO have ii becum????ii used 2 be de most talkative among my neighbours in de past,used 2 be de one who could laugh non-stop.Why did ii becum like tis????
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Its like evrythings over now.Now do ii understand y de corridor was exceptionally quiet when ii got home after going out wit my frenz yesterday.My sis told me tat yesterday de neighbours were extremely noisy and den my father so angry until he went to slam the front door shut.Den Fiqal's father heard and came out to shout at my father,like picking a fight wit him.Luckily ii not at home lor.And ii come home still gong gong one,happy happy talk non-stop.Until my sis told mie wat happen.Ok great.We were always at cold war wit Fiqal's family,but now,Fiqal's father has officially declared war on us.There will be no peace from today onwards tat ii sure of.How am ii ever going 2 face Fiqal they all again????HOW???? Sumone,tel me!! HOW??????ii used 2 hold on to a hope tat one day ii may reunite wit Fiqal they all,but now,even tat little glimmer of hope has vanished.I dont noe wat 2 belive in animore.Now its war between my family nn Fiqal's family.Racism war.Yy am ii being dragged into it as wel?????Why did tings turn outta like tat???Why why why?????????
